I definitely always had the impression with Fraser that he needs to categorize, like that's the only way he can live in a world that makes so little sense. And Ray (both of them) completely refuse to fit so nicely into boxes, and in the end it's Fraser who has to change to fit them. So in my mind (a twisted and complex place to be sure) it makes perfect sense that he can't write down Ray, how he feels about Ray, he just doesn't have the words. I think you're totally right about the filing away, he's such a passionate man, he's scary when he lets emotion come forward (Victoria). But I liked the idea that he can't just dismiss Ray.
In my family, watching the Princess Bride has completely surpassed going to church as the religious centre of our lives. I sometimes get the feeling that that's how we decide if someone's girlfriend/boyfriend is acceptable, if they don't like the Princess Bride, they're out.
Wow, that got long. And rambly.